Stage Play
by MissMinoriN
Summary: Its going to be one heck of a roller coaster ride. Rei x Shinji X Asuka. Incest Alert.
1. Chapter 1

_The feel of cold wind against my skin._

_The loud sound of raindrops as they hit the ground._

_Time seemed to slow down and everything went blurry._

_I didn't know what I was thinking back then._

_My filthy feet continuously hit the ground._

_I ran having no second thoughts, coated with only pajamas, bared feet and the crazy loud thumping of my heart beat._

_I was holding it tightly, a letter soaking wet with his words washed out._

_That time, I wasn't thinking of all the possible outcomes of what I was about to do._

_I don't care if I look crap._

_That time, nothing really matters, all I wanted was to reach him._

_And when I did, he gazed at me like he never did before._

_That moment felt like an eternity._

_I couldn't contain myself._

_I held him tight as I locked his lips with mine._

_It was bitter, salty... but sweet._

_It was long, deep... but soothing._

_It was my first kiss... with my brother._

* * *

"I saw you."

I don't hate her but I don't like her either.

I think we don't get along pretty well, we converse not so often.

She makes me go nuts.

She isn't an annoyance but her presence disturbs me a lot.

Probably because... she's my brother's lover.

Every single day that I see them together, that sight disgusts me.

Not because I hate her, I really don't.

It's because I hate them... together.

It may sound too hypocritical but that's my reality.

I love my brother, I really do and her, I don't give her that much attention but when they are together, it makes me sick to my stomach.

I'm deeply aggravated... and still I couldn't take my eyes off them.

"What did you see."

My words were not that of a question, they're a statement boldly challenging her if she has the guts to tell me what she witnessed.

I know what she meant, I know what she saw, I know what she wanted.

Say it.. if you could, if you would.

Not a word, even a mere sound left her mouth.

We stood there, staring back into each other's orbs, gazes peeking through our very soul.

We're both aware of what's happening and how chaotic some things turned out.

If we could patch it up, that's something neither of us can do.

It came to a point where we both know that we were doing nasty schemes, idiotic schemes... yet neither of us cared.

Not even my brother.

"You know what it was, stop playing dumb."

* * *

You're no different, was what I thought.

It doesn't matter who's dumber, we both are, or she was, and I am.

She first broke eye contact and turned to get her coat.

She isn't staying for the night even though there was heavy pouring rain.

My eyes were fixed at the sight of her back as she busily puts on her boots.

I wasn't mad, not even irritated in the slightest but... there's a weird feeling welling up inside me and it's a bit... painful, I guess.

I caught a glimpse of her face while she was grabbing an umbrella and I don't know, at some point my breathing got heavy.

"I am sorry."

i wasn't waiting for a response, I wasn't expecting any.

"Don't say things you don't actually mean. We've been way too pretentious for a long time. Don't you think it's about time we stop spitting lies in the others faces."

Are what she was supposed to tell me but they're all in my head.

Maybe she didn't really hear what I said, or she just completely ignored me.

She left, not saying a word.

The door clicked and I was alone in the hallway unable to move a part of my body.

The loud silence together with the sound of rain enveloped me.

* * *

"Hey... Do you think... Do time machines really exist? Mm, mm.. No, not that. Is there.. such a thing that could change things according to what I really wanted? Or, are there genies in this world? They could grant wishes, right?"

His room feels different since the last time I set foot in here.

I looked around, it was the same room after all, his things were in the exact same places, the smell wasn't anything new either, but... it still, it felt like a whole different place.

Also the sleeping form before me remained the same, and what I feel inside didn't change, too.

I fell down on the side of his bed and lay my head not far from his.

My mind went blank momentarily, I just watched him resting, wearing a soft look on his face, and no, he doesn't look like a baby.

Those long lashes, the lines on his jaw and lips, his steady breathing... watching him like this calms me.

I caressed a few strands of his hair, traced a short line on the side of his face.

"We are always this close... and I wanted to do a lot of things... I could, but I must not, and that.. it sucks. You're within reach... but if I selfishly do this and that, it might hurt me, it hurts me. Not just me, not just you. And its all because I started playing this game. A crazy game called reality."

Those were what I've always wanted to tell him, even though its only to his sleeping form.

I wonder if the rain decided to creeped inside his room, because the moment I closed my eyes and my body succumbed to weariness, a few drops hit my cheek.  
It trailed down, to my lips, it tasted salty, really salty.

* * *

"Rei."

My whole body feels warm.

I could still hear the sound of the rain and I know that I should be feeling frozen cold right now but I really feel warm and... happy, and guarded.

"Shinji..."

I don't need to open my eyes to know who called out my name, I recognized it right away.

I'm also in his room so, there's no doubt its him.

"Why did you end up in my room? Did you have a strange dream again?"

I shook my head, inhaling his scent and enjoying the rare moment that we share when his phone rang.

"Hello. Yes. What? How did that happen? Okay. I'll be right there."

It was her. Its always her. Why.

"Rei, I'm going out for a bit. It's Asuka, she's in the hospital right now."

I quickly sat up, out of his bed and walked right behind him.

I clutched the hem of the back of his shirt, tightly.

"Don- Take care."

I lightly pushed him passed the half opened door, closed and locked it, and sunk to my knees.

I say things even if I don't mean it.

I do things even if they are against my will.

That's simply because I know its the right thing to say, its the right thing to do.

But there are still that are inevitable, that even if I want to say, do and feel otherwise, they're still unavoided. Just like this pain I'm feeling inside me.

Whatever I do, I can't just ignore it... As it continues to grow, eating me.. and crushing me...

Little.. by little.

* * *

**t.b.c.**

**A/N: **Rrr! This time, I decided to do something that is completely out of my comfort zone... To write a fic with Rei as my heroine. I honestly don't like Rei but I don't hate her either. [That line was... haha, familiar, right.] But I would like to try something different and if it'll work out. If you're totally against incest, which is obviously what this fic is about then I'm sorry, just stay away from this fic. This is going to be different from my usual writing style. I don't know what's gotten into me. haha. Oh well. Feel free to judge, tell me your thoughts regarding the fic. Thank you and let's all have a great day. ^_^ Laters.


	2. Chapter 2

_I have always been completely honest with myself._

_I never looked at my brother as merely a sibling._

_Yes, pretty twisted but these are my feelings and it is my choice to hold onto them._

_I never realized how much I cared for him right before Asuka snatched him away._

_I felt extremely betrayed when he told me about them._

_Is he doing this on purpose to stop something that hasn't been started yet._

_Actually, who am I deceiving, I already know the answer to my questions even before I asked those myself._

_I've been watching you all my life and I may have overlooked various things but I'm not a complete idiot who will fool myself over and over, feeding with lies that you felt the same when it was served right before me, that bitter reality. I didn't take a bite but through seeing it alone makes me want to puke._

_I've been blinded by my own desires and failed to notice that we aren't the only ones in this world, in your world._

_I am simply doing what I know is the right thing for me, not the right thing in front of the eyes of the people who only knows what and how to judge._

_But at the same time, I am considering your feelings because if not, I might've taken actions that are totally against the rule of society._

_I wanted to see you happy Shinji but I am deeply sorry because I truly wished for my own happiness, as well._

_Other than that.. to hell who cares._

* * *

"Do you hate me? Are you disgusted now that you know everything? Us, is this something not worth trying because you don't feel the same? Or, you're only escaping because you know that its dirty?"

"Rei, stop. This is wrong. I'm your brother. What are you thinking?"

"I am thinking... What would you do if I kill your lover."

That was the first time he slapped me.

The sound of skin hitting another skin echoed and that sudden action was beyond my expectation.

"Don't drag her into this game of yours. Tell me, are you troubled by something? What is it, because I can't understand you at all."

"You don't have to. It's not that you can't, you just don't want to. I didn't mean it when I said I was having thoughts of killing her but the rest are true. You don't have to answer right away."

He isn't looking directly at me, he's staring back at my eyes but they were blank.

I could feel it, my whole body started trembling, that sight of him frightened me, he never looked at me like that.

He gradually took small steps, kissed me goodnight, then he was out of my sight.

It was a small gesture, a simple tradition between siblings.

I lightly touched my forehead, the spot where his lips just made in contact not so long ago, and unconsciously brought my fingers to my lips.

That night, I felt an incredibly different pain for the first time.

A pain that continues to grow but.. I don't give a crap.

I'm willing to cross the borderline. I do know what lies beneath.

I'm not prepared but I'll gladly accept whatever are the consequences.

* * *

"What are you doing here?"

"We are classmates. I know what happened and I felt the need to pay you a visit somehow."

No, she wasn't involved in a car accident and she didn't commit suicide.

Asuka fainted, fell on the stairs and sprained her right ankle.

"And you're the girlfriend of my brother. Why didn't you include that? Speaking of which. I'll be completely honest with you and plainly ask you straight to the point, why did you do that?"

I thought she's going to hit the bull's eye but she's still a little hesitant after all.

"I kissed him because that's what I always wanted to do. I was holding back for a very long time and that night, I was at my limit."

It had began, you didn't initiate a move yet, I am wondering, how you are going to play this so-called game, just how my brother described it, Soryu-san.

"Haha! Rei... Okay. This is... How should I... Damn. I didn't know what proper thing to say. You may be his half-sister but still.. Everyone knows you two are siblings and Shinji sees you as his sister. Only his sister. I'm totally confused. I didn't see this coming."

I didn't see you coming either.

Both of us were pre-occupied inside our little universe that we completely ignored the smallest events that could greatly affect our lives.

"I love him."

I already predicted what you're about to answer and you're mistaken, its not something you could understand right away and I think its something that you will never ever want to understand.

"What are you stupid?"

In life, if things don't go our way, we build a wall and shut ourselves behind that wall to avoid being wounded as much as possible.

That wall covers our eyes, mind, heart to understanding endless possibilities and even if we do, we ignore it, simply because we know its beyond our beliefs.

I don't think people like that are stupid, its just how they want to live life.

We see one side of something and we thought we know the entirety.

"Yes. I think I am."

I bowed and bid my farewell.

She had this sour look painted all over her face, an evident truth showing how she's totally against my confession.

"What did you really come for?"

"I think I told you what my real intentions are right from the start. You asked me about my brother first-"

"And you have the guts to call him your brother when you said filthy things-"

"STOP."

I didn't face her.

I don't know what I could've done if I did.

I took a short but deepest breath.

"You're no saint Soryu, I believe you have no rights to call what I feel for him filthy."

"What the hell are you talking about."

"I know about Ryoji-san."

It just came out of the blue.

Though I couldn't see her with my ow eyes, I could feel her hatred growing on me.

"You piece of.. Are you threatening me? Is this blackmail to stay away from your, ahem. brother?"

A nurse peeped through the small opening of the door, excused herself as she appeared from the other side grabbing some of Asuka's attention.

She bowed and hesitantly smiled at me.

"I am not and no, it isn't. I'm just letting you know. And again, I only answered your question."

I continued.

I stepped out of the room having no regrets at all. Unhappy but composed.

If its easy to restrain myself from falling my brother, I would've done so, a long time ago.

* * *

"Happy Birthday!"

I want you so bad that its killing me.

"I... wanted to apologize for my behavior. And.. and the things I said and did earlier."

I could stare at you all day.

"I could... dn't understand what's happening. You know you can tell me whatever's bugging you."

I actually don't know what you're saying right now.

"Rei? Hey. Are you even listening to me?"

We both blinked at the same time.

"Let's kiss."

Unconsciously, I mouthed those words.

Words that were only meant to be heard by me.

I didn't ask.

I didn't dare.

I said it casually like let's eat or let's go.

He ran his fingers at my bangs, dipping them all the way to the top of my head, finally settling at the back.

I never averted my gaze and so did he.

Using his free hand, he grabbed my right arm, I didn't flinch.

It was dark and I couldn't properly see his face but his heavy breathings were evident.

His the left hand dancing on the skin of my right arm, down, slowly, until it came to rest on the back of my hand.

Noncholantly shutting my eyes as he bring his face on the crook of the right side of my neck.

Burying the tip of his nose, it just felt so... exhilarating.

What on earth is this man doing to me.

I feel hot, absolutely hot, bloody crazy hot.

He deliberately brought his nose from my neck to me ear, as he whispers at his lowest voice.

"We can't be doing that when you have a high fever like this."

"I'm..."

"Shhhhh."

It's a part disappointing.

I was wondering, if it wasn't for the fever, will he really do it.

But the night is still young.

The sheer fact that i'm going to spend it with my brother makes me delighted.

Call it strange, but here is my sanctuary.

Right here, in his arms.

* * *

**t.b.c.**

**A/N: **First of all thank you reviewers and readers. Yes, chapter two and I'm actually enjoying writing this one. Haha. [Not as much as writing an SxA fic, but still, who would've thought.] I'm kind of shocked, myself, that I could write an Ayanami POV, we're complete opposites. XD Well Asuka's for a fact an open book in the Anime and the manga [with her past and all] but Ayanami... for me was an enigma all throughout. She being a clone is a factor but what would she be if she wasn't, that's what I was thinking. I'm trying my best to keep them in character as much as possible, I sure do hope I am. But, I wanted to give them a touch of my own, something to spice things up. My Rei was... madly inlove. Lol. Transparently. But she's still in a way reserved and more straightforward. My Asuka wasn't a complete bitch but still outspoken. And, Shinji... he's Shinji and emotionally unstable and... I'm still thinking what I should do with him. :P

**qwertyui: **I love weird, creepy, eccentric. And good to know incest isn't a bother to you at all. Yes, i'll definitely continue and sorry if it might take some time for updates. And right now, I have three fan fictions in progress.

**Gob Hobblin: **I, honestly, am not good with descriptive writing. I'm still working on it but I must say that this style suits me better. And yes, this universe that I created is without a doubt messed up. The more damage I make the better. And actually, I haven't even read a Shinji x Rei fan fiction, ever. O.o Hehe.

**KendrixTermina:** Yeah, I was a bit hesitant if I would continue with this incest thingy but well I did and I don't have any regrets at all. I'm striving for a unique Shinji x Rei tale in spite of the short chapter lengths. I still hope I could properly convey what the characters are going through, specially Rei.

Man, I was overly touched with these people. Really, thank you so much. I never thought it would caught anyone's interest. It was a great Christmas gift. hahaha. I know I have a lot to learn and your words make me want to push forward. Thanks again guys! [And sorry for all grammar mistakes, English is not my main language.] Happy Holidays everyone. ^_^


	3. Chapter 3

"You shouldn't have left the house if you aren't feeling well."

"Uhm.."

"No arguments ojou-sama. Rest well while I visit the other hard-headed hime-sama. Hahaha. But, thank you for taking the time to visit Asuka."

And I thought I could stay with you all night.

Together at this special day.

"Shin... Can't you stay?"

I probabyly know what you're about to say... yet I keep my hopes up.

"Hmm.. I would love to. But.. I already promised i'll spend the night with her. And!

She's going to be discharged tomorrow. Hehe."

You look genuinely happy.

Very contradicting from what I saw not too long ago.

"Is that so. Good for her."

Good for her.

You never neglected me before, but lately.. I just became the other option.. the less priority..

Or maybe you're just running away because of what i've said.

"I'm really sorry I won't be able to look after you. I'll call once I get there, alright?

My Rei's a big girl now."

You softly ruffled my hair.

Once again, i'm lost, deep within your unknown gaze.

We left the living room.

The walk through the hallway, I wonder if I can make it a little further.

Should I cast a spell on my room to make it disappear?

We both stopped right outside my room.

You held you right hand up and lay it on my left cheek.

You swiftly ran your thumb across my lower lip and walked away.

"Shinji!"

"Hmm?"

What was that.

I was seeking for an answer.

None, I couldn't read you at all.

I can't grasp the meaning of your actions.

"Mm-mm. See you. Take care."

"Yes, ma'am!"

You smiled, like nothing happened.

I gasped, a lot has happened.

The previous events, due to my fever, were nothing but misconceptions, yet again.

A never-ending cycle.

You would always choose her.

I'd let you, knowing you'll always come back.

Right?

You'll always come back to me, right?

No matter what happens, at the end, yo'll end up needing me most.

I know it, no, i'm certain of it.

The thought brought a small smile to my lips.

I entered my room and sat on my bed.

I saw it.. my own expression at the mirror.

and honestly it creeped me out... just a little.

* * *

xoxo

* * *

I was sheated in a calm and warm feeling of his embrace when I opened my eyes the following day.

He was in deep forty winks I didn't dare mess it up.

Dozing my mind off from life's actuality through studying his unconscious form is like listening to an unfamiliar song with a pleasing melody.

I can't fathom a distinct word but the harmony alone makes me want to continually listen to it as I fall in abysmal serenity.

"Rei... You... You're sleeping in my room again."

He

I engulfed my face on the crook of his neck.

Lost in his scent mixed with hers.

Its too bittersweet but nothing I couldn't handle.

After all i'm sure she felt stingy when she caught mine last night.

"Good. Your fever's gone."

It started when we were young, probably 7 years old.

That's when I started having strange dreams.

A time when kids would normally run to their parents room to seek comfort, I don't.

I always found my way inside my brother's arms.

"You're here, what about her."

He let out a deep breath.

Silence means they fought, yet again.

"She's so stubborn. I told her you're sick and you didn't respond to my messages and calls so I was worried I want to go home right after I bring her home. She wouldn't let me."

So this time I was the cause of her tantrums.

Its a first, might've been because of that.

Well, its partly my fault for leaving my phone inside my room.

"Sorry."

"Shhh. You're not at fault."

He arose from the bed as my head fell hitting his pillow.

He never, even once blamed me, even if its entirely my wrong doing.

"You should stop going to my room, Rei."

But most of the time, he does things that make me bitter.

"Why."

Its as if he wanted to shut down the place where I freely roam my thoughts somewhere else so that I can mindlessly lock myself inside the tranquility I could only seek when we're together, alone.

"We're adults. Siblings don't normally sleep together at this stage."

His back was facing me so I didn't know how he looked like.

"Who says so."

I sat up, sheets falling flat on the ground exposing my skin to the cold.

"When you find yourself a guy, you'll know what i'm talking about."

"You know who I really-"

"Stop it, please."

*Ding Dong*

He got a hold of the fallen sheet.

*Ding Dong Ding Dong*

We fixed our eyes against each other, his' practically wandered on my exposed skin but then he darted his eyes away.

He wrapped the blanket on me and before I could mouth a word, he's out of my sight.

I lunged backward, crumbling rocklike in the mattress, bringing my left hand up to my face making sure I put enough pressure in my eyes to prevent something.

To cease a release.

While at it, I felt something hard against my face and a little added weight on my wrist.

I held it up, my eyes appraising the simple chains entwined together, encircling my wrist.

"Insensitive bastard.."

* * *

xoxo

* * *

_So this is what taking you so long._

I searched for him throught the whole house only to find him in the entrance hallway, liplocking her.

They've been doing this scheme for so long, don't know why it never gets old.

She'd start an argument, most of the time childish nonsense ones but will eventually approach him first.

Not to apologize, he'll do all the talking, owning the blame.

She gets mad like nothing but cools off her head in a haste.

Shinji gets annoyed at her too but when he sees her, he'd yet again fall in her bewitchery in the course of time.

Asuka opened her eyes and immediately caught mine, concluding the kiss they shared.

She then caught him in her arms, still sharply gazing at me.

"How's Rei doing?"

"Her fever's gone. She's a lot better."

"That's great."

She pushed her mouth in a sardonic smile.

She's transparently doing this on purpose.

She nibbled his ear.

Really intentionally.

My eyes are glued, I couldn't drift them away.

No.

I don't want to take my eyes off them.

Still.. it pricks like hell.

Shinji tightened his grip on her waist.

She whispered at him.

He turned his head.

"Rei? What..."

She.. This woman.

Her quirky behavior is really something.

"I'm going out."

I softly said.

Just enough for them to hear.

My voice might've cracked a bit.

I don't think they took notice.

I walked past them.

"Rei! I'll come with you."

You shouldn't say that when she's around.

"Let me just get the umbrella."

"Wait Shin-"

Shinji dashed to get the umbrella, inbetween Asuka's attempt to stop him.

"Tell him I went ahead."

I ordered, my back facing her.

"Stop. What do you think you're doing?"

She asked coldly.

"And I don't accept questions as a feedback."

She added, as if she already knew I didn't intend to counterclaim directly.

"I don't want to see you together."

You want honest, i'll give you honest.

"Hah! Are you making me laugh? You didn't take your eyes off the whole time. If I didn't tell him, you might've seen something you wouldn't want to witness at all. You're pretty brave.. but crazy."

You just don't get it do you, Soryu.

You'll never know how it feels to have something that is within your reach yet still you couldn't get a hold of it.

Running away is not my thing.

Right now, all I want is to cool my head off.

As long as I know i'm capable of enduring, I will.

As long as he is existing, so do I.. and so are these feelings.

"I'm going."

But with your existence invading, there's nothing more I could do.

Just holding onto this little hope.

I recalled, I said I don't hate this woman.

I lied.

"I'll go with you, I have an umbrella."

"You don't have to."

I might do things offhandedly.

"I insist! Let's go."

Her way of thinking, so impervious.

I took off while she's busy with her umbrella.

"HEY! I said! What! Argh. REI!"

I don't know why she wanted to come, she doesn't give a damn.

I walked fast.

She won't be able to catch up, she's got a sprained ankle after all.

I needed to go as far as I could before he comes.

I don't want to see it.

Him taking her side.

Of course I want him to choose me.

But he doesn't have to, because he knows, we both know.. he already got me.

Just not in the way I want it to be.

Because i'm greedy..

..and I think so is he.

* * *

**t.b.c.**

**A/N: **I read a disturbing manga last night. Argh. It was soo dark and its yaoi. And, its still ongoing which is torture. Reading manga such as that was a punch in the face. But it might also get me in the mood. Kekeke.

If you guys wanted to read something for fun after reading my gloomy story, read this webtoon entitled **My Heart is Beating**. Interesting fun.

**NapalmInTheRain**: Hmmm. Soon. ^_^ thanks.

**KendrixTermina**: Thanks for reviewing and nope, i'm not going to create a yandere Rei. haha. Definitely, not heading that way. There are instances that we do things impulsively, and we don't even know we're capable of such actions.

**qwertyui**: Yeah.. She sure does. XD and thanks for constantly reviewing.

**Hashumba**: LOL. My gosh. I don't know... about that. but anyways, thanks.

**Malevolent Dark Reflection**: My story loves you... too. Keke. Rei's just... in love. Someone she's not supposed to feel that way. Thanks for the review.

Been dealing with personal matters of my own. Actually, these fics.. some of it are of my own experience then i'll just add some twist and turns. And as always, I really appreciate my readers and reviewers. Its awesome to know somebody appreciates...

Thanks once again, lets all have an epic day(s), laters.


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